Betrayal And Ungratefulness

What does ungratefulness mean? A quick check with the dictionary resulted with the following meaning:

"not feeling or exhibiting gratitude, thanks, or appreciation. This feeling always arise when you have done something for someone but the things you have done is not appreciated or not being credited. Sometimes, it may come with the feeling of betrayal or being short change as well."

The following is a real story that actually happened to one of my best friend.

It was like a soap drama come to life. My best friend, Angel, even jokingly says, "The movie industry stole her copyright". Yes, it had been awhile. Now she has been able to laugh and joke on a certain thing or past situation in her life but the anger and hurt is still lurking in her. Sometimes in a tiny little moment or a flip second, I can see and feel her anger resurface.

Angel and Pussycat was the best of friend since college. To Angel, Pussycat was the best buddy, and their friendship had been 13 years long. It would have last for a lifetime but this was not meant to be. All was well till she married her husband, Bob, and had her elder son.

At the time, Pussycat just broke-off with her boy friend. Out of sympathy and afraid that Pussycat would feel lonely, Angel invited Pussycat along whenever she had any celebration or outing with Bob. At the same point in Angel's life, she faced a lot of problem with her husband. They were constantly arguing on the household and financial matter. Angel's relationship with Bob's family was tensed as well.

As time passes, Pussycat seemed to get closer to Bob. It started in 2004, Jia Shen year, with Pussycat encouraging Bob to try out the new gym around Cheras as they lived in the same vicinity of each other. Angel's relationship with her husband seemed to improve for awhile after he joined the gym.

Angel did have her doubt and suspicious on her friend, Pussycat, and her husband, Bob, but she do not voice out the matter. At one point, even Angel's mother commented that Pussycat and Bob looked like loving couple more than anyone else, and warned her to be careful of Pussycat. On her birthday in 2005 celebration with her husband, Pussycat sent a love song to Bob. All this and other tell tale signs were noted by Angel, but she would rather not bring out the matter to her husband as their relationship was already in a shaky ground.

Angel chanced upon their affair after a short separation with her husband due to a big argument. Her son also mentioned to her that he saw aunty Pussycat with his father in compromised situation. At this point, Angel already pregnant with a second child had asked Bob what was his decision in regard to their relationship. But no answer was given and no action taken by Bob. In Angel's heart, she still hoped that there was a chance for reconciliation but Pussycat involvement dashed the hope away. Angel know that although her separation with Bob was not entirely due to Pussycat's fault but by being there, Pussycat had caused more complication to her already troubled relationship. This situation dragged on about a year, and one day Angel who was now leaving separately from her husband received a divorce letter from a lawyer which Angel had already foreseen it might came to this.

Although she did not confront her friend's affair with her husband, their friendship slowly come to a silent death. Shortly after their divorced, her friend married her ex-husband. Friends who know both of them were not invited to the wedding. Wedding photos posted into the internet social website only showed Pussycat in wedding gown. No groom was in sight.

Every now and then, Angel finds way to eardrop into her ex-husband and ex-buddy life. Angel found out recently that Pussycat gave birth to a child last year and she seemed to face the same problems faced by herself previously. Pussycat also lamented that her son is less precious compare to other people children, implying that her husband loves Angel's sons more. All this was heard with glee in my friend's heart. Angel is waiting for their downfall which I hope that she will grows out of it and starts a new. She is a strong lady with a survival instinct.

You might wonder (or might not) have Angel loss the loving feeling for her husband that she once had. I think not since she still pays attention to what happen with her ex-husband's life. She just don't have the energies and the generosity to love him more when harsh realities of life became a baggage and bugged both of them down. When situation was tough, everyone wanted to protect their own interest and put priority on their own comfort and need first. The fiber emotion of love does not dwindle but the baggage of problems became a giant snowball that overwhelmed everyone's senses. It made everyone loose sight of the love they once had been.

My advice to my friend, "Since she is already come to this path, it is better to let go of the pass and look forward to the future. Things which may seem critical and significant at this point may not be so as time move on."

For the BaZi enthusiasts, the following are Angel and Pussycat's BaZi Charts.

• Angel met the ungrateful punishment in the year 2004, Jia Shen year, form by the Si Snake (Day Branch)-Shen Monkey (Annual Pillar)-Yin Tiger (Year Branch). At the same time, her luck cycle was changing to the Ren Shen Pillar as well. The Cosmic Qi does not change instantly as the 10-Year Luck Pillar changed according to the age. Usually the Qi of the changing luck cycle will slowly begin to move in two year ahead of the actual Luck Pillar (LP).

• Thus, Angel already experienced the full ungrateful punishment in the year 2004 which will last till the Ren Shen LP. It was an external punishment indicating that she was treated unfairly by others. The Gui You LP also indicating a third party problem whereby the Friend Star appeared on the stem and the You Rooster on the branch of the LP combined with the Chen Dragon on the Hour Pillar in the natal chart, Angel's Direct Officer Star which represents her husband star in the natal chart.

• Pussycat's BaZi Chart already has the full ungrateful punishment [Si Snake (Day Branch)-Shen Monkey (Month Branch)-Yin Tiger (Year Branch)]. Those who have the ungrateful punishment at the BaZi usually see themselves as the victim. They always feel being short changed and no one appreciated what they have done. This also because they naturally attract people who are ungrateful and selfish around them. As you know, "Birds of a feather flock together". They may appear jolly and cheery [effect of the Growth Star, Si, Shen and Yin] but their view of life or people are actually quite pessimistic. In actual fact they can be and likely ungrateful themselves too. In Pussycat's natal chart the Ren Water which is the Rob Wealth are just next to her Day Master indicating she is competitive in nature and tend to be jealous and envious of others' good fortune. Since people with this punishment always feel victimize, they have no qualm doing the same to others.

• BaZi is about doing the right thing at the right time. Whether your view of her action is the right thing to do or not, in accordance to her chart this was the event enfolded. In the year 2004, the Shen Monkey, Si Snake at the LP of 24 and the Yin Tiger in her natal chart formed the ungrateful punishment externally. At the LP of the 24, the Seven Killings Star appeared. The Star represents a boyfriend star and it can represent a mean streak as well. A vindictive action, Pussycat who had broke-off with her boyfriend intend to get back one even if it was her friend's husband.

• At the same time, Pussycat's luck cycle was slowly changing into the LP of 34 which was the Direct Officer Star. It was an indication that her action at the current LP will likely land her a future husband.

• The affair took place in 2005, Yi You year. The Yi You Pillar was always related to betrayal sign.

• Angel officially separated with Bob in 2006, Bing Xu year. The Xu Dog clashed with Chen Dragon on the hour branch in Angel's natal chart. The Chen Dragon represents the Direct Officer Star which is also the husband star.

Looking at Angel and Pussycat's Natal chart, you would have noticed that both of them had the same Day Pillar of Gui Si and Year Pillar of Jia Yin. Although Bob may have married twice, technically speaking he had married to the same person. Angel and Pussycat both shared the same Day Pillar of Gui Si with the Hurting Officer Star at the Year Pillar of Geng Yin. This means that both Angel and Pussycat have the almost similar core value and traits.

In short, Bob is… eh! hem! foolish, dump, naïve, stupid, unwise, you name it, because he was before, and is now married, to the same old issues and problems. From Angel and Pussycat's natal charts, he seems to be attracted to women who have similar traits and characters. I guess there is no easy way out in life. You just have to learn the lessons of life with this or that person.